Nalu 2016 One Week
by Meellaa
Summary: 1. For how long has Lucy longed for something other than the monotonous every-day life of working as a cashier. 2. That is until her childhood friend suddenly came along. How she had missed him, 3. how proud she was of him now that he had become a superstar. 4. But nothing that has been separated for so long can go back to what it used to be so long ago and being so close but so fa
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hello everybody! It is time for Nalu Week once again! Happy times. Well here we go. I have a little something something figured out that I'll be writing on the go. Hope you enjoy, as always, if you do or don't, please let me know and I'll try to better it. Last year I was WAY too busy but this time the story will be continuous so if something doesn't make sense, I'll have to fix it.**

 **Enjoy! =D**

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1\. Longing

"Hello." "That's 143.75, please." "Thank you, have a nice day." "Hello." "That's 512.90, please." "Thank you, have a good day." "Hello." "Anything else?" "That's 465.90, please." "Thank you, have a nice day." Hello." "That's 400, please, that doesn't happen every day." "Thank you, have a good day." "Hello." "Oh, okay, you just go ahead and grab that." "That's 465.90, please." Didn't I have that one recently too? "Thank you, have a nice day." "Hello." "That's 950.50 please." "Thank you, have a good day." "Hello." "That's 21.80, please." "Levy, can you grab me some more change?"

"Sure, what do you need."

"A bit of everything."

"Sure thing."

"Hello, sorry about that, I'm out of change." "Thank you, have a nice day." "Hello." That's 25.75 … 56.75… 30.99… 238.25… 299.90, oh so close… 350, sharp again… 1350.90, seems like you're having a party huh… there's the gang of kids again… 15.90… 12.90… 10.90… 13.90… 15.90… Ice-cream would be so good right now.

"Hey, Lucy, can you help me a sec." Yes please!

"Sure, what's up, I've got no queue."

"Great. So this customer…"

Wellp. At least it's a break from the cash desk, for like a second. Oh no, there's a queue building again. I don't want to… I explain the solution to Levy's customer's problem quickly, having done so at least seven times in the past. Levy is new so of course she wouldn't know. She's a quick learner though which I appreciate. Especially when it's about common problems like these. There isn't a day when at least one person comes in with every problem. Except maybe three.

"Excuse me, are you just going to stand there and chat?" A woman snaps from behind and I reluctantly trudge back to the cash desk.

"I'm sorry ma'am, there's a lot to learn in the beginning and I'm in charge of teaching her." I say and quickly blip her groceries. She doesn't even listen but glares at the way her things slide down the other end. I glance at it and see that her loaf of bread is stuck and squished at the bottom. Great, now she's gonna yell at me and I'm gonna have to try and not to tell her that it's her own damn fault for putting the bread on the band first. She glared at me, her face turns a shade of pink and she seems to swell. Here it comes.

"Lucy. I'm sorry. I can't get it to work." I turn around. Levy stands there with the phone in her hand, her eyes nearly brimming with tears, the phone clutched to her chest. I hear the loud voice of someone shouting coming from it. I turn to the woman again.

"That's 146.95 please." She looks like she's been holding her breath for the entire time. "Levy, take over real quick, I'll handle it."

We change places and the woman immediately melts as Levy explains to her that it's her first day and she has a lot to learn. She then, with trembling fingers, precede to receive the money and hand the change back. I pick up the phone that Levy has placed close and hold it a bit away from my ear, still hearing the man on the other hand shouting loudly.

"...I will not the treated this way, I demand to speak to someone who's competent and in charge of this establishment..."

"I'm sorry for the inconvenience before, sir. It is my colleague's first day. I will take care of it right away. May I ask you to repeat your inquiry so that I can handle it properly?" There's a short silence and then the man rambles on about his problem in a very grumpy tone of voice. I fix the problem quickly and make a mental note to go through it with Levy later to make sure she understands it properly. This won't be the first time someone will call in with this problem.

I sigh and take a deep breath wishing today was over, desperately trying not to look at the time for the thousandth time. But there I go again and of course, it has only been a few more minutes since I last checked. All in all I still have two hours to go and time could not move slower.

Two years I've worked at this place. I got sick of it the first week in, but I have to pay for a living alongside my studies. I don't really have a family to speak of but at least my tuition is being paid. I'm already not on speaking terms with my father; it's not like I'm about to go to him to complain about having to work. In a way though, it's rewarding to work for my own money, but I wish my job was more fun.

I study Journalism at college so I suppose it's fair to say that I love to write. That might even be a bit of an understatement. Every minute of dead time I have at work, I spend it writing. My pockets are full of receipt paper that I've scribbled on. Not always something cohesive. Sometimes simple for the joy of putting pen to paper and writing something, even if it's nonsense or something I've written a thousand times before.

I was surprised to learn that I'm one of few to continue to college of those in my high school class. I don't know what everyone else does but I can't believe that they've gone far. Well, that's their bad. Although I don't mind it, it's not like I had that much of a choice in going to college. It was either go, or be disowned. I would have gone no matter what but not being disowned is nice. It was basically just me, Levy and Gajeel. I guess Erza could have studied if she wanted to. But for Levy, she had the highest grades of our year, but she went off to pursue her fencing career. Talent like that was not to be wasted, according to her coach. Elfman focused on sports too but I forget what he eventually chose. He was good at practically everything.

Of course there's one person I can never forget. Besides Levy he was my best friend. We practically grew up together even though we only met freshman year. His wild bushy pink hair and his wild grin are things I would never be able to forget. Even after two years of not hearing a word from him. I say we grew up together because it's basically true. I can't say that I've seen anyone grow as much as he did. When I met him he was truly a kid, wanting to paint his white cat blue because it was fun and bring him everywhere. I'm still not entirely sure if the cat appreciated it, although he insisted the cat was fine with it. Although it hissed occasionally, it never scratched him. The last time I saw him though, you wouldn't have been able to tell that it was the same person. Sure, he still kinda looked the same. But the air of him was so different. He was like his cat, Happy, who had accepted its fate to be treated as a toy by a boy.

I just wish I knew what he had to accept.

I wish I knew why he left.

"Lucy!"

"Lucy!"

"Hello!"

I jump and look around. My eyes catch the clock. I've been daydreaming for five minutes. This is not good. I look around again, and as expected, my boss stands in front of me looking stern.

"I'm sorry." I say quickly and look around for what I'm supposed to do although I can't seem to find anything useful.

"Shift changed five minutes ago." Miss Strauss says and crosses her arms over her chest.

I quickly move away from under her scrutiny and hurry to the back of the store where a pile of boxes is already waiting for me to drag into the store and unpack.

I can never decide which part I like less. Having to deal with angry customers or unpacking stuff. Both are repetitive, neither is fun, one has too many paper cuts to count and the other has spit in my face. *Sigh* Both mean avoiding the other though. And every time I find myself wishing I could switch. If only I could forget myself in the work, time would go so much quicker. But of course that would also include being able to stop wishing to be interrupted by a customer asking where to find a specific item. Upside, I can definitely forget myself in my thoughts if nothing interrupts me. (But that doesn't happen too often).

Occasionally I fall back into my day dream. Remembering his wild grin that made me believe he would take the world by storm. Remembering the butterflies I used to have because of him. Remembering how utterly annoying he used to be, just because he could.

Whenever I think back to the people I used to go to school with, I always end up thinking about him. About how I miss him. About how I wish I could only know where he went… And if he's happy.

Well I went there again. In the back of the store I give myself a vigorous shake and do a few jumping jacks. I can't keep thinking about him. Miss Strauss is already on red alert for some reason. I really don't want to give her another reason to flip out.

Bah, it's only twenty minutes before I quit. I'll have to find something useful to do for at least fifteen and it's annoying because I never manage. It'll end up being ten minutes and I can't quit ten minutes early. Well. I have to do something.

I find the boxes that contain the most fun things there is to unpack; shampoo. How depressing when shampoo is the most fun thing to do. I can't wait for the twenty minutes to be over.

I remember then that I can spend a few minutes going through the solution to that problem with Levy. I unpack the packs and as I expected, it takes ten minutes, too early to quit yet. I head to the front of the store and hesitate. My heart skipped a beat and it's like there's something familiar about the person who hurried around the corner. I recognize the smell of them. But I shake my head. It's probably one of those buff nice smelling guys. There are a few who come in here regularly.

I find Levy and explain the solution to her problem again and she tells me where she thinks she got stuck last time so that I can explain it thoroughly. I make her show me as she does it once and there is nothing I can do to correct her.

"Great. Now let's get out of here." I say and start away. Levy follows me to the back of the store where the changing rooms are. We change and chat. Usually I'm too tired to care what my other colleagues have to say, but with Levy I have to at least make an effort. She is my best friend after all.

"How was your first day?" I ask.

"Scary," she says, "But I think I'm getting the hang of it." I smile at her.

"You'll get there. I'm sure."

I hang my work clothes in my locker and wish I could leave them there forever. I'll have to wash them soon though and I'm not a fan of having them in my apartment. It's enough that I have to wear them at work.

It feels like an eternity ago since I wore normal clothes that fit me well and that are actually comfortable and good looking, at the same time. Since it's summer I wear shorts and a simple top. I just hope that it's still warm enough outside for me not to regret this. I put my hair up in a ponytail at the side of my head and have it fall over my shoulder. I don't look myself in the mirror since I'm sure I look as tired as I feel and I don't want it confirmed. I throw the strap of my small bag over my shoulder and wait for Levy to nod that she's ready to head out. We meet a few people who have the evening shift and silently pity them for having to stay at this place. At least I do, I don't know if Levy is quite there yet.

"See you tomorrow!" We call to no one in particular and get a "Yea!" In return from someone whose voice I at least can't make out. Nor do I really care to.

We step out through the personnel entrance and turn left to follow the deserted street to Levy's bike. I have a strange sensation of recognition. Which is strange to feel out here. At the store, I understand it since things can literally repeat themselves. But out here… I've never even walked with Levy on this road that I can remember. She lives in the opposite direction from me. She has no reason to come meet me after work having her bike locked down at the place there the people who work here put their bikes. It makes no sense.

And then i realize who it could be and my jaw tightens and my hands ball into fists.

"I thought I told you not to wait for me after work again, Gray. I don't want to see you anymore." I say in as dangerous a voice as I can manage. Levy turns around and her face drains of color. Her jaw drops as wide as it would go.

"You dated Gray?"

I feel the color of my own face drain. That is not Gray. It is a voice that I am very familiar with. So familiar I can still hear it in my dreams because I have dreamt about him more often than I can even remember.

I turn around, tears brimming in my eyes.

There he stands. Pink hair, wild and spiked in every which way. His wild grin plastered across his face as if he could take the world by storm.

"Natsu!"


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I've missed writing fan fiction more than I want to admit. So much fun! =D Hope you enjoy this one. And I'll see you tomorrow ^^**

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2\. Reunion

"Natsu!"

I just stare at him for a while. I'm dumbfounded, it's as if I expect to have him disappear into nothing at any moment. I don't believe that he's actually there, actually back. So many times have I wished he was back, wished that, at least, I knew where he was. Why did he come back this time and not the others.

Finally I manage to tear my eyes away from him and look at Levy.

"You see him too right, I'm not hallucinating?"

She turns to me her mouth still open until she laughs out loud and slaps me on the shoulder.

"Are you kidding me right now? Have you not been moping about him for the past two years?" My face burns bright red

"I have not!" But of course my protest only proves her right.

I turn to Natsu again, embarrassed, not wishing he could go, but at least wishing he hadn't heard. By the blush on his cheeks I think he did though.

He's just like I remember him. Strong, well built, his shoulders so square they could carry any secret into the grave and not even break a sweat. He still looks as young as he did two years ago. Nothing of what he might have done shows on his face. Not a line of exhaustion or of happiness. It's like he dropped out of time for those two years that I missed him.

Except of course he does look a little embarrassed which isn't something I've seen on him before. I can't say it's not cute, in fact, it's adorable. What I long for the most though is his strong arms surrounding me in a safe and comfortable bubble of his hug.

I feel a smile drift away from my face as I look him in the eye. Although I don't expect a response for some reason, I can't help but ask.

"Where have you been for all this time?" … I've missed you. But I can't say that last part. He looks shy now. This is also new and I hope there aren't any more surprises. He shakes his head and scratches his neck. He used to do that when he was hiding something. I frown a little.

"You know, I've been asking that myself for a long time." He says eventually, a crooked smile on his lips and looking up at me from under his eyebrows. "I've missed you, Lucy."

Tears sting my eyes again and this time I can't resist it any longer. I throw myself at him and clutch him to me as if he'd disappear if I didn't. I hold onto him for dear life and when I feel his arms around me too, it's like I've finally found home again.

"I've missed you too." I whisper into his shoulder at tears dampen his soft scarf. I don't know if he hears me and I barely care. I have a mind to keep him in my arms all night long. Even if it means that I have to stand outside of work to do so.

Eventually though we break apart and Levy stands next to me looking elated.

"We have to celebrate this! I'll call Gajeel and tell him to get ready! Remember that pub we used to go to?"

Natsu grins and nods. "How could I forget." Levy grins at him.

"How many fight did you get into?"

"Too many to count." He says, grinning too.

I just stand there, enjoying his warmth. I should probably feel awkward about standing so close, but I just can't. I wish I could take his hand like I used to and just hold onto it so that I could make sure he won't just disappear. I still can't really believe that he's back. I just stare at him as if I were trying to remember every curve of his body. It's useless, really, because I already know it all.

Levy turns to me then. "I'll head home and get ready. You should too. I'll call Erza and Jellal and Loke and Gray! They'll all be so happy to see you again!" She blushes. "Okay maybe not Gray." She says in an undertone then brightens up again. "Come on! Hurry! I can't wait to see Gajeel's face!" She runs over to her bike, unlocks it and jumps onto it in quick succession. She motions at us to get going then drives off.

I turn to Natsu and look him in the eye, momentarily forgetting what I was about to say; losing myself in his beautiful eyes. He smiles softly and I blush. I clear my throat and look away.

"So where are you staying?" I ask and kick at the concrete that is coming loose below me. But then I look up. "And how did you know where to find me?"

He smiles at this.

"Actually it wasn't too hard. It's all over Facebook." He says. But that reminds me that, as far as I know, he doesn't have Facebook and at the very least, we aren't friends there. I clutch the strap of my bag and try to swallow the lump that's building in my throat. I wonder what that means.

"As for the staying part. I was actually wondering if I could crash at your place." I look up at this, frowning, and before I can stop myself I ask "Why?" I frown at him. "Why aren't you staying with Gray?" He shrugs and turns to walk away, in the wrong direction from where my apartment is. He digs his hands deep into his pockets.

"Well, since you and Gray dated, that would be awkward." … I guess? He turns and grins and his grin is as full of life as I can remember. "Besides," he says, "this way I can spend more time with my best friend."

I smile at this, I can't help it; that grin of his is too infectious. I gesture with my head to the right of the store and start walking that way. Natsu catches up to me with a little run and he grabs my hand and swings it like he used to do. I have to laugh at this even when I want to frown at his lack of a bag and belongings and at the skip of a heartbeat that makes my chest ache. I can't help myself though and halfway to my apartment I tell him that I'll race him the rest of the way and start running without giving him time to accept the challenge. All I hear behind me as he starts running too is "That's unfair! I don't know where you live!" I laugh loudly and wildly, something I haven't done since he left.

"Loser has to shower first!" I yell over my shoulder, because the water always take ten minutes to warm up. Only he doesn't know that.

As I run along the streets with Natsu at my heel, I remember that I haven't been running for a long while and I'm getting out of breath. Natsu, behind me, on the other hand seems like he could run on for hours. I can't help but wonder what he's been up to these past two years that has given him such endurance.

The street turns to the right over a bridge and along the city canal. My home is in sight and I start to slow down, huffing and puffing, completely out of breath, when Natsu laughs behind me. I am just about to turn around to frown at him when he sprints past me. I gasp and almost stumble over my feet as I do. He runs backwards for a while and grins happily.

"You haven't moved!" He laughs and runs straight for my apartment. I gasp again.

"Oh, no you don't!" I shout breathlessly and run as hard as I can, catching up to Natsu who grinningly, tauntingly, keeps a firm two meter distance between us. I urge my legs to run harder and already feel the sting in my legs that tells me I should really really really stop right about now. As if.

The distance between us gets smaller. I used to be good at this, sprinting shorter distances and Natsu should still know this. We are crossing the street at an angle and as always there are no cars around to run us over. One meter, I can almost stretch out my hand and grab his scarf and pull him back; but that would be cheating. Almost there. We sprint up the stairs leading to the front door, both of us taking three at a time. My hand is outstretched wanting to be first!

Both of us crash into the front door, Natsu into the wood, I into his firm and damp back.

We stand there laughing, catching our breaths. My legs shake as I take a step back from Natsu, needing something solid to hold on to. He turns around and leans against the door, grinning, panting, beads of sweat glistening on his forehead. His shirt clings to his body a bit tighter than it did before.

"I win." He says and punches the air with his first. I laugh, leaning back to lean against the wall next to the door. "You sure did."

I have miscalculated though and the wall is not at all where I thought it would be. Lost in the sight of him I stumble and the next thing I know is that Natsu's whole body presses me against the wall, his right hand on my waist, his chest against mine, his nose barely a hand's breadth from mine. The world has suddenly gone silent even though both of us are still panting and the canal on the other side of the street is still making the same noises it always does, the occasional sound of a fish jumping to get away from a predator piercing the silent evening.

I can see nothing but his eyes though as I gaze up at them, I can feel nothing but his breath on my lips and his hot hand on my waist. Now I can see how different he looks. How much he has grown, even if he hasn't gotten much taller than before. There is something in his eyes that tells me he has secrets now, when he used to be able to tell me everything and anything. There is a hardness there that tells me that he has seen things that cannot be unseen nor unknown. And the way he holds my waist tells me that he has lost people he wishes he could have kept in his arms. And a petty part of myself wonders if I was one of those.

I hold my breath for a few seconds, trying desperately to tell myself not to cry and not to let him know how much I've missed him. I don't know why this is important to me. I guess I don't want him to know how much it hurt when he left and never contacted me. I guess that I too have secrets from him, now.

I make myself smile, I tell myself that the run here was as fun as it used to be, which isn't a lie. I stand on my tip toes and kiss his nose.

"Welcome back." I tell him, and when he releases me from his grip, I pull out my key and unlock the door.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Yeys! Another update! Thanks for the favourites follows and thank you for the review! I hope you like this part!**

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3\. Admiration

"Welcome back." I tell Natsu, and when he releases me from his grip, I pull out my key and unlock the door.

Barely inside the apartment my phone rings with a message from Levy saying that Erza and Jellal are out of town and are taking the first train back to see Natsu. Loke was excited and said he would absolutely come to get together. She had also contacted Gray, even though I do not want to see him, but he is still Natsu's friend and deserves to know that he is back and the chance to catch up. I suppose I can understand that, even though I really don't want to see him.

I notice then that Natsu is reading the message over my shoulder. I also notice that I'm standing just barely inside the apartment and there is no way Natsu could close the door without making himself fall over me. I catch his eye over my shoulder and he looks somber.

"Tell Erza and Jellal not to bother. I won't be able to stay for long." He says nonchalantly as he takes off his shoes. I almost drop my phone. It's as if he's finally back, only to slip out of my grasp again.

I make myself swallow and turn away to hide the sudden tremor in my hand.

"Oh." I say and am grateful that my voice didn't break. "When do you need to leave?"

He doesn't answer and steps past me, his shoes already off and his jacket hanging on a hook next to do the door. I look at it for a moment, remembering how another jacket with the same owner used to hang on that very hook.

Eventually I look at him as he steps into the living room of the apartment and looks around. He puts his fists onto his hips when he turns around and frowns at me.

"You don't have a TV." He states. I shrug and step into the apartment as well. A sofa and two armchairs surround a coffee table where a left over tea cup still sits waiting to finally be finished. Next to it lies the book I was reading the evening before. Behind the sofa is my desk where all my school books are threatening to fall in on each other. Almost all walls are covered with shelves and bookcases and they are filled with books nearly to the brim. A few plants are in desperate need to be watered.

I shake my head as I pull the hair tie out of my hair. "No, I don't really have time to watch anything. Besides they're expensive." I say and pick up the blanket I'd been wrapped in last night and fold it just to have something to do.

"Well that explains a lot." Natsu says. I look at him and frown a little. His eyes are intense on my body. He meets my eyes after a bit and grins. "I'll tell you when we're at the pub. This needs a beer and some good music."

He proceeds to pull his shirt off over his head and suddenly his chest is bare and I can see in what other way he has changed. He used to be nearly scrawny. Now he's strong in a lean sort of way. The muscles of his arms are defined by the dent of his shoulders and the shadow they cast over the skin of his lower arm. His pecs are square and a great complement to his abs. There are new scars on his body too. The one on his neck I was used to, but here and there, there are fresh ones, one even so pink, it can't have been more than two weeks old.

He doesn't seem to notice me looking at him and turns around before he finds the door that leads to the bathroom. But just before he closes the door, he looks over his shoulder and winks at me.

I blush bright red and move to the closet to prepare a towel for him. I place it outside the bathroom door and then head back to the living room to flop onto the couch and process what just happened.

Natsu is back.

He's really back.

Not only that, at this moment he's probably naked in the shower.

I hear the water turn on followed by Natsu's screams and curses at the cold water. I forget to tell him.

The next few minutes pass by pretty quickly. I text Levy Natsu's response about Erza and Jellal. They won't be happy but if they're far away then I guess it's understandable that he doesn't want them to take the trip in vain. Natsu gets into the shower and I assume that the water has gotten warm by now. I can hear him sing off key, another thing that is familiar. If it meant he would stay I would listen to him sing every day.

He takes his time, probably snooping through my things. He always used to do that even when he knew exactly what I owned. Eventually though, he comes opens the door shortly and closes it again and I assume he's taken the towel to dry off. A few moments later he appears in the living room again, a towel tied around his hips and a content smile on his face. His hair is still wet but parts of it already insist on standing up in every which way. Drops of water fall onto his shoulders and run down his chest. I watch them go, not wanting to look him in the face just yet because I know I'll be embarrassed after watching him for so long.

He carries his clothes to his stomach and walks to the desk to throw his shirt over the back of the chair. I assume that he wants to let it air for the time we have left. I assume that he has nothing else to wear.

Although I'm terrible curious at this, I make myself not ask why he has nothing with him if this was a planned visit. Instead I stand and head to the bathroom, and pick up a towel on the way. It's steamy hot inside. Apparently Natsu still likes his boiling showers.

I put my hair in a bun, undress and step into the shower and I try not to think about him, if just for a minute as I stand there and the water drums on my chest. Although my mind wonders to him every now and then, I force myself to wonder what I'll do if Gray shows up tonight. I haven't and haven't wanted to speak to him in over two months since I ended it. He was more angry than heartbroken I think but I never found out why. Maybe Natsu can knock some sense into him that will make sure that he doesn't bother me anymore. Every now and then he shows up at my doorstep or outside of work or even in the store. Those times are the worst because I can't be rude to him, or yell at him to back off when I'm at work. He never says what he wants when he shows up though, he never begs me to take him back or tell me that he's sorry for something he might have done. He just stands there and stares at me and that's what creeps me out about it. I wonder what it'll be like to see him intentionally again.

I can never really figure out why Gray and I dated in the first place. It feels like a total fluke. And maybe it was. All I know that I was still upset about Natsu leaving and he was just there, always, anytime I thought I might need someone, he showed up on my doorstep. He never asked questions, he just handed me something tasty and went to the kitchen to make tea. We'd sit all night and watch a terrible movie and laugh together. Two months ago though, I was finally made aware of the fact that I was trying to project whatever feelings I had for Natsu onto Gray and it wasn't fair. I told him as much too when I ended it. He didn't even say a word. He just stared at me. And then I told that I need some space from him and I told myself that if I was just alone, without any male friends, maybe then I would be able to stop thinking about either of them. Long story short, that didn't work out either. And now Natsu is in my apartment. If he hasn't gotten dressed yet, he's practically naked. What on earth am I supposed to do now.

I realize then that I've been standing in the shower for all this time without washing. I pour a large amount of soap onto a fresh sponge and start washing. My thoughts run every which way, I no longer have any control over them. I let them go wherever they might wish and try not to listen to them too intensely.

Once I've washed and rinsed I turn off the water, step out of the shower and wrap myself in my towel. I wipe an area clean in the foggy mirror and look into my distorted reflection. I look as tired as I thought I might when I quit work. But there is some more color in my cheeks and my hair has taken on the moisture of the air in a decent way. I put moisturiser on my face and step out of the bathroom.

Right outside stands Natsu, still wrapped in his towel and he looks at me so intensely, I forget to breathe for a moment.

"What's up?" I say and try to open the door more so that I can pass him. That's when I see that he's holding onto the door and he's not letting me through. I assume that he's playing a prank on me, like he used to but when I make to push his arm out of the way, he doesn't budge, nor does he push me back in a playful way. He simply stands there and takes the pressure of my push. I look at him again and frown.

"What's up?" I ask again, a little more forcefully this time.

That's when he grabs my neck and face in his hands and pulls me roughly into a kiss.

I am suddenly stunned. I did not expect this.

Yet his lips are so familiar, so soft and tasting of warm cinnamon. I realize that I haven't had anything with cinnamon since he left and now I know why; because it reminds me so forcefully of him that I want to break down and cry. I can feel tears springing to life under my eyelids and I make myself push him away.

I know my face is flushed but not only in embarrassment. He looks just as angry as I feel.

"You can't just disappear like that. You can't just disappear for two years and then come back as if you had just gone out to grab some cat food." I take a deep breath and feel a tear fall down my cheek. "You can't just leave and then come back and kiss me as if nothing had happened." And this time I push past him and he doesn't hold me back. I run into my bedroom and close the door behind me.

I wish I could just throw myself onto the bed and cry like a child. But he would hear that and he would probably come and comfort me, as he always used to do.

I can still feel his lips on mine and I lick them slowly. They still taste like cinnamon.

After a while I get dressed in a short skirt and top. I put my hair up in a ponytail to the side of my head and put some mascara on. When I get ready to leave my room, I tell myself that I will act as though nothing happened.

I check my phone again to confirm that Levy did in fact say that she was ready to leave and that Gray said he would come. If I said I wasn't nervous, I'd be lying through my teeth. It makes me wish that Erza was still in town. She'd be able to keep both Natsu and Gray in check.

I leave the room step into the living room. Natsu sits on the couch and his eyes find me right away. He stands and grind. "Ready to go?" He asks. He too acts as though nothing happened and I partly glad for it, partly angry. I would love to shout at him some more, but I suppose this is for the best in any case.

I nod and head over to the small hall to put on a pair of sandals. Natsu follows behind and puts on his own shoes. He nods and me telling me he's ready and I step out of the apartment. He follows closely and I lock the door behind him.

The walk to the bar isn't long but we don't talk on the way there. I suppose that acting normally can only go so far when you haven't seen each other in two years. Once we get close though I brighten up because I can hear the live music playing and soon I can also see Levy and Gajeel standing outside, waiting for us. I wave at them and Levy waves back. Gajeel on the other hand, looks about the same way as Levy and I did when Natsu showed up outside of work, earlier. His jaw drops and his eyes go wide and when he has pulled himself together and we've gotten close enough he grabs Natsu around the neck and rubs his knuckles over his scull. "You little piece of shit." He says and Natsu, in vain, tries to get away. Levy laughs behind her hand but then straightens up and waves. I turn around and see Loke and Gray walking towards us. Gray's and my eyes meet and I blush and look away. Gajeel has finally lets go of Natsu who stands up and straightens his jacket. He turns to the two oncoming men then and grins.

Natsu and Loke hug while Natsu and Gray mostly stare at each other. I suppose there is more tension going on there than was expected. Eventually though, Gray swears under his breath and he and Natsu hug like brothers. The slaps they give each other's backs feels like a slap to my own chest.

When greetings have been exchanged we all head into the pub and a familiar scene greets me. I am surrounded by friends who are chattering happily, a standard band is playing some rock cover in the back and in the front there is a football game on. As soon as we walk inside we are greeted by a shout of cheers as someone scores a goal and the smell of spilled beer wafts over my face. The only thing that is strange now, is that I am not holding Natsu's hand and I am not in deep conversation with someone about some strange but brilliant plan we should totally do once we're done with highschool.

We get a table and every stares at Natsu expectantly. I suppose now is the time I learn why he left me without a word.

For a moment Natsu doesn't speak and simply stares at us. Even Gray, whom I could assume Natsu would have told of his whereabouts, seems to be oblivious as to what he has been doing these past two years. Then again, I assume that he would have told me while we were dating.

"So are you going to tell us or just stare at us?!" Gray yells eventually.

Natsu laughs.

Everyone else looks at each other in bewilderment.

"Does none of you have a TV?"

We look at each other again.

"Holy shit, you really don't know. And here I thought you were all playing me."

He grabs his phone from his pocket and types something on it. Then he shows us a picture and I swear, all of our jaws drop at the same time. The picture is of Natsu holding up a trophy, surrounded by people who are lifting him up and cheering him on. Natsu is a player in the Magnolia Jets and they have just won the championship in basketball.

Everyone stares at him.

And then it's as if we were ten more people and everyone was cheering and asking questions at the same time. I only catch a few here and there. "How long have you played with them?" "But you are so short!" "How did you get in touch with them?"

My own voice is drowned by the sudden ruccos.

"Why didn't you tell us?"

And when I look up at him, he meets my eyes with a sad expression.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hi everyone. I've had a bit of a strange day today, so I'm sorry if this chapter isn't as good as I would like it to be. Please let me know if you think of a way to make it better.**

 **I hope you all had a nice day!**

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4\. Secrets

A few days go by rather quickly ever since Natsu showed up. His reunion party at the pub was a blast according to Gajeel although I felt pretty awkward throughout the whole thing. Back at my place I gave Natsu my spare key and told him I had to go to bed because I had work the next day. He told my good night and I went to change and meant to give him a blanket and pillow once I had. What a surprise I had when Natsu wasn't in the apartment when I came back out of my room and he didn't show up until I had fallen asleep on his blanket and pillow on the couch waiting for him. I woke up the next day and found myself in my bed although I distinctly remember not falling asleep there. Out in the living room, there he was, sprawled on the couch, drooling onto his pillow.

I didn't have the heart to wake him up so early and he must have gotten back pretty late. I had my breakfast, wrote him a note telling him I went to work and left. Work was uneventful as always and I'd rather not dwell on it, as always. Levy did fine though and didn't have any major problems. Of course, you can't really avoid the occasional angry person, no matter how polite you are. Afterwards though, he wasn't at the apartment. I suppose I can't be too surprised that he didn't want to stay there all day. There are only so many times you can go through a person's belongings so I went out again to buy some groceries to prepare dinner.

On my way to the store I thought I saw him several times, quickly disappearing behind corners when I turned around to check. It was only every the swish of what I thought was a white scarf or a flash of pink. I couldn't be sure what it really was and even less so if it was Natsu. I tried to ignore it and went about my shopping and I managed to lose myself in the questions of what I could do with the food I was putting into my basket. Although I wasn't really aware of it, I bought the things I knew Natsu would like.

On my way back though, I saw Natsu for sure, and I didn't like what I saw. He stood in the opening of an alley way, looking around as if waiting for someone. Curious and apprehensive, I stopped and waited for something to happen, and it did. A man I didn't recognized walked up to Natsu, expecting to see him there and they walked into the shadows of the alley. Again curious and maybe even more so, I crossed the street and headed for the opening of the alley way where I distinctly saw Natsu handing the man a bag of something sealed away, and the man, looking eagerly at the bag handed Natsu money without looking up at him.

I turned away from the alley to lean against the wall, suddenly out of breath, my heart thundering against my chest. I hoped desperately that I was wrong about what I saw. I don't want him to have been dealing drugs even if it felt even stranger that he would be selling them in a town he hadn't been in for two years.

I hurried home after that and tried to act as if nothing had happened when Natsu eventually arrived, a wide grin on his face and a bag of groceries in his hand. I looked at him, wondering what he'd brought but when he met my eye, I had to look away. His gaze was too intense and I felt too strange about what I saw. I was the most uncomfortable encounter I've had in a long time, including breaking up with Gray. I couldn't keep conversation with him even though he seemed very keen on asking me what I'd been up to these past two years. That too was strange though since he still hadn't apologized for just up and leaving.

In an effort to at least be pleasant, after dinner I showed him what I've been working on through school and he seemed interested enough. Distant though, which I couldn't explain and he kept checking his phone. Eventually, after a while of just sitting in the living room and after a maybe thousandth time that he'd checked his phone, he frowned and gripped his phone very hard. I could almost imagine it breaking in his palm. I met his eyes then and he stood.

"I have to head out for a bit." He said and went to put on his shoes. Before he left the apartment, he turned around once more. "Don't wait up." and he left without another glance at me.

The next day was no different only I didn't have to go to work, having a rare day off. At breakfast where Natsu and I sat together I suggested I'd call Levy and Gajeel to ask them if they wanted to hang out. We could walk around town and see how it has changed over the past two years. Natsu looked up at me intently at this suggestion and stared at me for a moment, not unlike Gray has done the past two months whenever he'd shown up. It was very disconcerting. He shrugged then and said that he already had plans.

It was hard to believe at first since he said it with such certainty, as if I was already supposed to have known this. An awkward moment ensued while I stared at my breakfast and Natsu continued to gobble down his own. I wanted to say something then. I wanted to ask what he was up to, where he was going, what he had been doing in that alley the day before. It was like I had a complete stranger in front of me and I couldn't get the words out of my mouth.

When Natsu was done with his meal, he stood and went over to the entrance and put on his shoes.

"See you later!" He called and had the decency, I suppose I should call it, to flash me one of his familiar grins before he left. I didn't know which hurt more, the fact that he was treating me like an insignificant acquaintance, or that he seemed to assume that I was alright with everything, which was far from the truth. As if I was some sort of doormat that he could simply walk all over.

I tried to do some school work but failed miserably. I could have called Levy and told her about it, but my stomach roiled at the thought of having to talk to someone about Natsu. I just couldn't wrap my head around his behavior and on some level, I don't think that I wanted to understand it, I just wanted him to be the person I had known.

The third day was no better than the first. But this time I decided that I had to do something. I spent all day at work coming up with a plan of how I would breach the subject with him, how I would talk to him and how he would explain to me that there was a perfectly reasonable explanation for his behavior. I imagined myself getting angry and telling him off for not calling or texting me these past years. I would yell at him, telling him how much I'd missed him and how dare he simply tackle back into my life and act this way. He would apologize profusely and beg for my forgiveness which I would elegantly grant him.

Here I sit now, a blanket around my shoulder, the book I've been trying to read for the past four hours lies open in my lap, the cup of tea I made when I started my wait stands long forgotten and cold on the table in front of me.

Of course I had fallen asleep, I'm not used to staying up late anymore. Especially not when I'm trying to read. Natsu just arrived back from wherever he's been and he stares at me, his eyes wide open, his arms out stretched, his toe only just hitting the floor, looking exactly like a thief who is sneaking about.

We stare at each other for a while and eventually he puts down his leg and straightens up. He scratches his neck.

"Oh. You're up." He says. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." I frown at him. All my plans from work fly out the window. He looks dangerous as he stands there and I realize that his knuckles are bloody. I stand up and let the blanket fall to the floor.

"Where have you been?" I ask.

Natsu bites down on his jaw and looks away. His hand still at his neck but he can no longer act as if he's scratching some itch.

"I can't tell you." He says in a flat tone that I neither like nor recognize. Tears well up in my eyes.

"I don't believe you." I say. His brow draws down and he glares at me.

"Well that isn't my problem, now is it." He says and I'm surprised at the sudden hostility. I step around the table to stand in front of him.

"Natsu, what is going on?" I want to reach out to him but it seems that he has changed much more than I expected. At least the use of his name sparks some reaction and he looks me in the eye. I almost wish he'd look away. I lean back but stand my ground.

"It's none of your business." He says and moves forward to walk past me. I step sideways to block his path. I put my hand to his chest and can feel his heart race there.

"Please, Natsu. You show up out of nowhere and now you act as though this is completely normal. You can't…" I hesitate. "You can't expect me to accept this. You can't…" But he interrupts me.

"Don't tell me what I can and can't do." He nearly yells, a finger pointed at me. "All of this, all of it I did for you!"

"What are you talking about?" I say desperately. "What is going on?"

He stared at me.

I stare at him.

He shakes his head.

"If I tell you..." He puts his head in his hand. "They will know… And don't ask me who they are!"

There is a long silence before he looks up at me. He sighs and lets his hand drop. He straightens and suddenly looks far older than I have ever seen. The way he looks at me though, reminds me of a lost kitten. His eyes drill into me and yet again, there is nothing in the world other than his eyes.

"Lucy," He starts and takes a step forward, looking awkward, apologetic and almost frightened. A shiver runs down my spine when he says my name. "I have been blackmailed." He says. My eyes widen but I hold my tongue because I have a feeling that he won't continue if I interrupt him now.

"And if I didn't do what they said, they would go after you."

And he proceeds to explain the real reason why he vanished so suddenly two years ago.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Alright, sorry I missed yesterday, I kinda wish yesterday hadn't happened, the weirdness from the day before lingered big-time. But here we are, new chapter WOO! I did it! Please let me know what you think! Getting replies from you kinda makes my day. Hope you're all well and see you tomorrow!**

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5\. Struggle

"Well. Really I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I had crappy luck and I messed it up." Natsu walks over to me, sits down and puts his head in his hands. He suddenly looks exhausted, but he goes on.

"I was already in a bad place. Knowing we'd all go our separate ways after we finished school messed me up bad time and I didn't know what to do. I was just so angry all the time that I was looking for something to beat on. Well, someone and I wasn't looking for anyone in particular and it was too much of an effort to constantly get into drunken brawls at the bar. I needed something real. I dug deep, it went on for about half a year before shit really went down. Every now and then someone would call me, tell me a time and place and I'd show up, beat someone up while people were betting and shouting at me and when it was all over, I'd win a hefty sum. It was addicting really. No one ever questioned the bruises since I already fought at the bars all the time." I nod and am suddenly confused about the roar that comes to life in my chest. I remember the time and I remember being afraid of losing everyone as soon as school was over. But I never knew how hard it was for Natsu. I never knew he was hurting so much. I don't know if I should be angry at him for never telling him, or feel for him, because I knew, if in a smaller degree, what he was going threw.

"Well. It always took some time for me to get my money on the nights that I fought so I had to linger and although I would try not to, I could always overhear things. Things really didn't want to know about and for the longest time I think they believed me. I can't tell you who they are. Don't ask me who they are. But eventually, they no longer believed that I couldn't overhear their business talk. I never thought they were on to me, I really didn't but one day, just after a fight they came up to me and pulled me into the shadows. They threatened me and when I told them that I didn't care what they did to me and that I would knock them all out… they said they knew you, knew where you live, knew your whole family and your friends and there was nothing I could do. I couldn't even pretend that I didn't care. They had me cold.

"One of them, a tall guy, never saw his face, came up real close to me then and said 'if you want to keep her safe, you're gonna do exactly what I say.'" A shiver runs through Natsu and I can almost feel it myself at the thought of such an encounter.

Natsu looks up at me, steely eyed but a glimmer to them that remind me of the onslaught of tears. He sniffles.

"There was nothing I could do, Luce. They never said what they would have done to you but their threat was clear." He stands, suddenly seeming angry, fists at his sides. "I was not about to let them harm you." He starts to pace the room, back and forth, anger in his voice now.

"That's pretty much it, isn't it. Two months later they told me I had to take my shit and leave. I didn't know what they wanted me to do, they told me I had 20 minutes to get my stuff and I weren't at the place they told me to… well, I knew what would happen.

"I ran all over town but I couldn't find you anywhere. You weren't home, not at school, not at the library, at Levy's. So I had to go. I looked for you for so long, I didn't pack or write you a note." He stops and turns to me.

"I don't expect you to understand. But I did what I had to do to keep you safe. I would do anything to keep you safe."

He looks like he wants to shake me into understanding him. As if that would make his point, as if that would take away the pain. I swallow hard and try to make myself keep his eye contact but fail. Tears make my vision blurry but I don't know what to do with myself. I stand up and put my hand to my stomach because it suddenly hurts in confusion.

I have missed him for two years and he's finally back, only to tell me that he had no choice in leaving. I turn to him then.

"So why are you back now?" I say, my voice surprisingly calm and surprisingly void of emotion although I feel like I'm about to choke on the turmoil that is rumbling through my stomach. "I saw you dealing in that alley, you're not off the hook." I add.

Natsu looks embarrassed.

"I will never get away from them." He says shaking his head. "They've made it very clear that the only way I have to keep you safe, is to stay."

"That doesn't answer my question, though." I say. Again that pained and embarrassed look. He scratches his neck.

"Well…" He hesitates. "Since I didn't have a choice in the matter…" He meets my eye then and they are suddenly hard as stone. "I've been moving up in rank."

My jaw drops, my eyes widen and the turmoil in my stomach drops to the floor so quickly, it felt as though a weight was lifted from my stomach, and not in the metaphorical, good kind of way. I feel rooted to the spot, chained there by the anger that has replaced the turmoil and I cannot find a way to justify any of it.

"You what?" Is all I can say.

"I needed to know that you were safe but they wouldn't let me see you. So… I made them trust me…" I shake my head and sit down.

"I didn't ask for this." I whisper, suddenly fighting against tears. Natsu comes around the coffee table and kneels in front of me.

"I know and I'm sorry. But what else was I supposed to do?" I let my head sag into my hand for a while as I push back the tears, refusing to let them out.

"I see you don't know who my father is." I say and look up when he only draws back. "You wouldn't have needed to do anything if you'd known. Nor would you have needed to do anything if you'd told me all of this before! Why didn't you tell me, Natsu. We were best friends, you practically lived with me, ate my food, slept in my bed…"

"How could I tell you when we did all that and you still thought I was just your friend. How could I have told you that I was afraid you'd leave me because I was just your friend?"

"You were never just my friend." I say. Natsu shakes his head.

"But I was never anything more either."

And again, he grabs my neck and kisses me fiercely.


	6. Chapter 6

**6\. Climax**

 **You know, writing smut is really hard when things aren't going your way… spiders and then I burned my hand... Pro tip, don't catch a pizza fresh out of the oven with your hand. It hurts. A lot.**

 **I had to divide this smut into two because most of it was not T-safe. You should be able to find the link to the M version of this chapter on my page soon. I'll link it here as soon as I can!**

 **Anyway, sorry for the late update. Here we go!**

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Why didn't you tell me, Natsu. We were best friends, you practically lived with me, ate my food, slept in my bed…"

"How could I tell you when we did all that and you still thought I was just your friend. How could I have told you that I was afraid you'd leave me because I was just your friend?"

"You were never just my friend." I say. Natsu shakes his head.

"But I was never anything more either."

And again, he grabs my neck and kisses me fiercely.

So many things were rushing through my mind at the same time, I could barely rejoice at the feeling of his lips against mine. I want to push him away and ask what he meant. I want to slap him for suddenly kissing me. I want to hold him to me and tell him I'm sorry for not doing something to get him out of that situation.

I put my hand on his shoulder and pull him closer to me and he presses his chest against mine, my legs to the side of him. A bubble of excitement settles in my stomach and I hick-up slightly as I realize what I am doing. I am kissing Natsu Dragneel, the boy I have dreamed about for over two years. Did I feel this way about him all this time? Did I dream about him because I wished I had done this before he left me? Has he felt this way about me all this time? Is that what he meant?

His hand finds my waist and I arch my back into him because the feel of him is something I could never have imagined. Whatever I tried to have with Gray, this was nothing like it. My hopes for replacing this with what I thought it should feel like, could never have come close to reality.

Natsu moves his hand to the small of my back as I arch into him and presses me closer to him. He kisses me like a man who has tasted a lot of fruit but has finally found the one that tastes the best. He takes his time feeling the textures of me, at least that's what I understand from the way his moves his lips against mine. He kisses me in different ways; tenderly, fiercely, roughly, even lovingly. He tastes my lips with the tip of his tongue and a shiver runs through him when I reach to taste him as well.

The hand on his shoulder moves down to his chest and I can feel him breathe heavily. My other hand reaches for his head and buries itself in his hair. I pull him closer, lean back and allow him to move up onto the sofa, surrounding me with his presence even more. The hand moves away from my waist to support him next to my head. The other stays at my neck, feeling its way over my jawbone as he tilts my head back, draws circles over my throat as he keeps exploring my mouth. Both of my hands move to his waist and before I know it, they've slipped under his shirt, feeling his hot skin, his muscles as his breath catches momentarily and a moan escapes his lips.

I feel like I want to explode, the feel of him is exquisite and overwhelming. When he leaves my lips and kisses my neck instead, my breath catches and I move my hand to my head because I feel like it'll roll away if I don't. I don't ever want him to stop. At the same time, I have to wrap my head around all of it. Softly, I push at his stomach and just as softly, Natsu moves away from me and sits next to me. The hand he held himself up with rests on my leg, the other moves down my arm to hold my hand. He leans his head against the back of the sofa and I turn to face him completely and do the same. We look at each other, the same soft smile playing on our lips. Every now and then one of us leans forward to kiss the other as if making sure that what we felt was real, that it happened and wasn't just a dream.

My eyes keep roaming over his form, the shape of his face as if trying to memorize every bit of it. The corners of my mouth hurt as I keep smiling, giddy at the idea that I actually kissed this magnificent person, terribly surprised that I haven't done this before, thinking myself foolish for every trying to have something with Gray that I barely even understood. Because Natsu was right, I did only see him as my friend before. I never knew what it meant to live with him, what it meant that Natsu would pull my close at night and hold me, that he would kiss my cheek as a greeting whenever he came home and how I would be happy to see him, how I would leave into his kiss and smile at his closeness.

He was always there, not only was he there for me, he was simply there, made me feel safe and appreciated. I was never just a friend and he was never just more than a friend. He was my lover before I learned how to love him. I never knew what I had before I got him back.

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 **A/N: It was surprisingly hard to write a T-"smut" o.O**

 **Hope you liked it!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: This is why I want to have a finished story before I post it somewhere. I'm notoriously bad at first of all finish something that I've started to publish, and even worse at getting back into something I haven't touched for anything over a few weeks. Let's but it this way - This, updating a chapter this late, if a first.**

 **It has been bothering me for quite some time thought, that I didn't finish this story, which I enjoyed writing. So here we finally are! The last chapter of the Nalu week! Waaaay late! I don't even know if the prompt is the right one but I'm just gonna go with it.**

 **Thank you for the love and support! I'm sorry it took so long to get it done!**

 **The last chapter of Nalu Week 2016!**

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Ending

When I wake up I find myself wrapped in hot arms and pressed against the hard, hot and breathing front of Natsu. One hand rests over my stomach and a wave familiarity washes over me. It's as if I'm back two years ago, the morning he vanished and I only know how very comfortable I was in his arms, how I wished we would never have to leave this bed. I feel the same way now.

I wiggle closer to him and feel him snuggle his face closer to my neck. His breath is hot, like everything else of him.

As comfortable as I am though, a rush of sadness falls over me and a shiver runs down my spine. Because I know that this can't last; Natsu will have to leave and he won't be staying long. It's barely been a week and I have to lose him again.

I sit up, feeling suddenly cold and I wrap my arms around myself, barely aware of the fact that I am wearing a shirt but it gives me no warmth. It doesn't take long before Natsu's arms wrap around me again and although I know that they are warm, I can't really feel it. He kisses my shoulder and squeezes me in his embrace.

"What's up?" He asks. And although it isn't anything he can do about it, I pull away from him and stand. Again I swap my arms around my middle.

"You're leaving again." I say and his sweet face turns solemn. He too stands and places a hand on my hip. I look at him and my breath is momentarily stolen by his intense eyes. He leans into me and kisses me tenderly but I can't kiss him back in the same way and soon I pull away. He doesn't come after me this time and only when I look up do I see the glint of sadness in his own eyes. I bite my lip.

"How can I go to work today wondering whether you will still be here when I come back."

"You think I would leave without saying something?" he says with a small frown on his forehead. I smile a little at that.

"Yes." I say and grab my robe from a peg on the wall. "Because in all the years I've known you, you have never said the words 'good bye'."

We look at each other for a moment and when he doesn't protest I pull on my robe and leave the bedroom.

It takes a while before he joins me at the breakfast table. He's gotten dressed in black jeans and a t-shirt that fits him perfectly. He hurls down his food as he always does and I can't tell if it's habit or if he is trying to avoid my stare as I watch him eat, only moving my müsli around and around in my bowl.

Despite what happened last night, I believe him capable of leaving me without a word. Even if I believe that he tried to find me all those years ago, I believe that he could do it again, now that he's already done it once. And yet I can't keep my eyes off him. I wish I could tell him to leave right now so I wouldn't have to wonder, at work, if he'd be here when I come back, and even if he were just out as he's been so often, whether he'll come back to me at all. But I can't bring myself to telling him to leave. I can't say the words "you should go" because I don't want him to. To just seem him for a little longer, in this moment, feels like it's worth the pain it might cause me tonight.

Without a word I leave the table, without having eaten a single bite and I can sense Natsu's eyes on me as I head to the bathroom. I can't hear a chair scraping against the floor but I know that he has followed me. The prickling at the back of my neck doesn't leave me when I turn into the bathroom and I leave the door open. I let my robe drop to the floor and seconds later I feel warm and rough hands on my arms. He moves his hands over my arms to rest over my hands that hold onto my top ready to pull it off. His chest is pressed against my back now and again he kisses my shoulder tenderly.

I can't help but sigh and push closer to him. I desperately don't want him to leave me and I turn around in his arms, wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him fiercely. He responds without hesitating, showing no surprise, only simple acceptance of my kiss. It is desperate and I know it; the way I kiss him. It's like I try to make myself remember the taste of him because I can never know for how long I can't see him. There must be a reason he was never able to contact me. I push myself closer to him, moving us into the shower as I do, but I don't care. Anything I can do to forget that he's leaving, soon and I won't be able to see him and I'm desperately afraid that I will never see him again. He doesn't exactly have a safe job.

No. I don't want to think about that.

I turn on the shower, fully aware that it will be ice cold, and fully aware that we are still wearing our clothes. Neither Natsu nor I react to the sudden gush of cold being dropped upon our heads. He clutches at me and I clutch at him and our kisses are desperate. Maybe he feels it too. Maybe he feels desperate too. Maybe he has to leave sooner than he wants to.

Slowly the water turns warm and with it our kisses turn to passion rather than desperation. Then they turn tender and at last, we simply hold each other under the boiling hot stream of water. My ear is pressed to his chest and his chin rests on my head. Despite the thundering water overhead, I can hear his heart beat loudly in his chest. I can't tell whether he's excited or scared and I try not to think about it too much, I try, very hard, not think about it. I wish I could stand here forever; in his arms.

When we do break apart, it is Natsu who reminds me that I have to go to work and although he offers to wash my back, I tell him I can handle it by myself. I tell him I'm sorry about his clothes though but he shrugs, kisses me and steps out of the shower. Through the foggy windows I see him take off his shirt at pants and wring them out in the sink, then he turns around and I imagine our eyes meet through the fog and I think that he says something, but before I can hear what it is, he leaves and closes the door behind him.

I shower, wash my hair and try to ignore the pain in my stomach that is getting strong and stronger at the prospect of work. As the water thunders over my head I can't even feel that tears fall down my cheeks and I make no effort to hold them back.

When I step out of the shower, I somehow know that he's already left. The apartment feels empty and cold, despite the heavy mist that still hangs in the air from the shower. Almost numbly I walk from room to room, making quite sure that I'm right. He's left. He left without saying good bye.

The last room I check is the kitchen. My breakfast still stands on the table but he put away his bowl. The corner of my mouth twitches despite myself because it was one thing I could never expect of him; to clean up after himself. Fresh tears spill from my eyes and I am suddenly overwhelmed by the fact that there is nothing left of his. Nothing left that I could have kept as a reminder that he was in fact there. No forgotten toothbrush, no disturbed pillow, not an unclean bowl. He's completely gone. And so it takes a while for me to notice the note on the table and when I do, I am shivering with sobs and afraid that I'll read something I'll wish I'd never known.

Slowly and with trembling finger, I pick up the note, blick furiously to clear my vision and look upon the untidy scrawl that is Natsu's handwriting.

"Lucy.

"I know you won't forgive me, but you were right, and at least you won't have to wonder whether I'll be there or not when you come back from work.

"Since you never asked, there's only one thing I ask of you. Look at the game the Magnolia Jets played on your birthday this year.

Natsu"

Angry tears spill from my eyes this time an I ball up the note and throw it as far as I can. It bounces against my wall of books on my desk and it topples over and falls everywhere with loud crashes. And I can't hold in the anguished cry that bursts from my mouth as I scream. I don't know what I feel more; anger, sadness or regret. Anger that he left, anger that he left with such a terrible note as the only thing left of him. Anger and sadness that I thought I knew him, anger sadness and regret that I kissed him, thinking he felt the same way about me. I should have known better. I should never have trusted him once I learned that he had become a professional criminal. He must have lived off lying, how could he have not lied when he was with me. I grab the closest thing to me and throw it too; a cup of tea that I didn't make. It smashes and the tea flies everywhere. I don't care. I can't care. I can only bury my face in my hands and cry out in anger again.

It feels like I will never again stop crying. It feels like I will never be a normal person again, who laughs and smiles and makes jokes with her friends. It feels like I will never again look upon a person and trust them.

But of course, my misery passes. Levy shows up frantic with worry but when she sees me, she probably understands why I haven't answered my phone in all this time and why I have missed my work shift. I hardly even care about how angry Miss Strauss must be. Because when Levy shows up and I see her face, for a second I think it's him, I think that he's come back to me after all. And when I see that it isn't, I'm for the first time in my life disappointed to see my best friend and I am immediately ashamed of it and fresh tears stream down my face and Levy comes to me and hugs me tightly. I can feel her look around the room, she must see the broken fragments of the cup I broke. It was another reason for a fresh wave of tears because Natsu had bought my that cup and not it lay shattered in pieces in a puddle of dried tea.

When I finally manage to calm my sobbing Levy kneels in front of me and holds my hands.

"What happened?" She asks. The only thing I can do, shaking and hick-uping is point at the ball of paper that was Natsu's note. With a squeeze of my hands, Levy goes to pick it up and reads it. Comprehension fills her face and she walks over to me and takes my hands again.

"I understand you're upset." She says. "And I know you knew him much better than I did." She looks worried when I shiver violently at what I think she's going to say. "But I don't think he did what you think he did. And it would be terrible if he didn't and you thought that he did. Let's watch that game and if it turns out that he did then you can hate him as much as you want. And if he didn't, you'll know that you don't need to be angry at him, just sad that he left the way he did."

I want to tell her no, that I want to hate him, even if he didn't lie to me about everything. But her words make sense once they really sink in and I nod. Levy pulls out her phone and looks up the game and then forces me to move over to the couch.

We watch the game. Neither of us is really interested in sports so half of the time I have no idea what is going on. I watch Natsu as he sprints up and down the field, jumps and scores, gets cheered on my the people in the stands. He seems to love the attention and I want to hate him for showing off to girls as he does when he blows kisses to them, winks at the camera, wipes his hands on his shirt, all of it, I just know it, is to show me how stupid I was to trust him. The man I thought I knew, whom I that I grew up with, who, for an evening, I though loved me.

The game ends with their victory and I tell Levy to turn the video off when an interview with Natsu Dragneel is being announced. I make to stand up, having already decided that I will hate him forever. But Levy grabs my hand and I don't have the strength to resist her as she pulls me back down onto the couch.

"Dragneel! Dragneel! Can we have a word?" The reporter shouts and Natsu, who is flirting with the crowd turns around looking annoyed. He's still panting and sweat glistens on his skin. After a few glares and a few moments to catch his breath, he nods.

"Mr. Dragneel, please tell us about your girlfriend." The reporter says. Levy sighs. I close my eyes and they sting with fresh tears.

"I don't have a girlfriend." Natsu says just as I'm about to stand and find a place to cry again.

"But Mr. Dragneel, that's just the point. We always see you flirting, but we never actually see you with someone. Please. Our readers are dying to get an answer to this question."

Natsu looks angry for a while and my eyes are riveted by the angry look he gives the camera. He seems to be thinking it over before he waves them away in an angry dismissal.

"I don't talk about my love life." He says and turns away.

"Then at least answer this." The reporter shouts and Natsu hesitates without turning back. "Who is Lucy?"

The glare Natsu gives the reporter makes him take a step back and a small whimper is audible. Natsu turns to the camera then and even the camera man takes a step back, but Natsu strides up to him and grabs the camera so that it is centered on his face.

"Let me make one thing very clear." He says in a menacing voice. "There is only one woman in my life and she doesn't even know that I love her. That is how it has to stay because if she finds out, I'm in big trouble with my friends." The reporter whimpers again.

"But this is television..." He says in a way that sounds as if he wished he didn't have to state the obvious. Natsu actually grins and lets go of the camera. The camera man staggers back a few steps and seems to regain his balance with difficulty. When he's straightened up again, Natsu is facing the reporter.

"The only thing you need to know is that I would marry her if I could, but she'll never know that because she doesn't have a TV." He pauses then faces the camera again and his voice softens a lot. "Happy Birthday. Maybe one day it is safe for you to see this. I'll let you know when it is." And he leaves the reporters stammering, and goes to celebrate the victory with his team mates.

The next few days went by in a confused blur. At work I had to both keep myself from grinning wildly and from bursting out crying suddenly. I did all of my classwork at home because it was even harder to avoid the confusion emotions there. Levy spent a lot of time with me. I think she was worried, but all in all, I was okay. I wasn't angry, which was good, and I was only sad that I couldn't have held him in my arms once I learned the truth. And it was the truth that made my liable to grin like a mad woman. As if I had the power to fly away with this grin, if only I had wings.

I wrote my first piece in a news paper. Nothing special, I think, but Levy said it was a really fun way to let Natsu know I understood. In it told him, obscurely, that I had gotten the his message and that the next questions he would ask me would have the answer yes, no matter what it was.

It was only a month later that I came home from class, opened my mail and found an engagement ring and a note with the words.

"I have never needed to tell you good bye because I always intend to come back."


End file.
